When I had my son, I was determined to avoid putting him in day care while I worked. It wasn’t just that I didn’t love the idea, but as a single mom, I would never have been able to make enough money to make day care make sense. I knew that all my money would have gone right to paying for it.
This is a common problem that almost every parent struggles with when their children are young. I know that sometimes, one parent can stay home with their children until they are school-age, but in my situation, that wasn’t going to be possible. I had a lot of feelings about not being able to be a stay-at-home mom, but I also didn’t have a lot of time to dwell on it.
While I knew I would have to earn an income, I really wanted to be present for that part of my son’s life when he was little, and I thought that spending time with an attentive parent was important for his development. But I was a single mom without much willing help from family members, so I had to get creative.
I worked part-time jobs that let me make my own schedule
I was able to take care of my son and me by having a small business and being an independent contractor. I cleaned homes for a small number of clients and taught yoga classes in the community throughout the week.
Cleaning someone’s home for three to five hours could earn me between $75 and $150. Depending on which yoga studio I was teaching at and how many students attended, I made between $20 and $100 per one-hour class. The best part about being my own boss, though, was having the ability to make my own schedule, including rescheduling if my son got sick.
I found a morning-only preschool program for my son
Through other moms, I heard about a church not very far from where we were living that offered schooling in the mornings. Not only had it come highly recommended by other mothers, but it was affordable. After a visit and talk with the school’s director, I enrolled my son.
For less than $250 a month, my son could be in school for up to six hours a day, from 8 a.m. to 2 p.m. I didn’t worry about him while he was there or feel guilty about it because I knew he was getting a good early education and socialization. I arranged my schedule so that I only worked when my son was in school or with his dad for part of the time.
I went back to school online and finished my degree while my son slept
During the years between my son’s ages of 2 and 4, I completed my bachelor’s degree online. After I put him to sleep around 8 p.m., I went right to my desk and spent two to three hours a night completing my coursework over a two-year period. Without qualifying for financial aid, I would have never been able to finish my degree that quickly with my budget at the time.
I knew I would need a degree to make more money for us, but I also wanted to continue to have the same schedule as my son, so I pursued a teaching career. By the time my son started voluntary pre-kindergarten at 4, I got my first full-time teaching position. This enabled us to be in school or work at the same time, so we would be home together at night, on weekends, and on holidays.
It wasn’t easy, but I created a good work-life balance
It was never easy having to work as hard as I did to earn enough money and still find a way to be present with my son. I was lucky that I was young at the time and still had a lot of energy. But thinking back to that time period today, I do remember being bone-tired.
I think I only found a way to achieve the work-life balance I felt my son needed and that I wanted out of sheer survival. Not wanting to have to work full-time when my son was that little was the main driver behind all of those decisions early in his life and my journey as a new mom.