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Al Pacino is reflecting on why he chose to never get married.
In his new book Sonny Boy, out now, the actor, 84, explained why he never married while writing about his relationship with ex Kathleen Quinlan. He recalled meeting Quinlan at a party hosted by Lee Strasberg in New York City, while Pacino was hanging out with Robert De Niro.
While Pacino and Quinlan were both in relationships at the time of their first meeting, he wrote in the memoir that he and Quinlan entered a casual relationship some time after he began filming 1983’s Scarface.
Pacino described Quinlan, now 69, as “my comfort” during the filming of that movie after long days spent portraying a villainous character and a difficult shoot.
As Pacino wrote, he and Quinlan traveled to Europe together after he finished filming the movie. He described their relationship as “the closest I’ve ever come to getting married.”
“But I’ve always shied away from marriage. I guess I didn’t see how it would help anything,” he wrote. “I just wanted to avoid what I thought, at the time, was the inevitable: an entrance to the pain train.”
Penguin Press
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Quinlan went on to marry twice, first to artist Warren Long and then to actor Bruce Abbott. She and Abbott divorced in 2022. In the memoir, Pacino wrote that he remains grateful for an ongoing friendship with Quinlan and reflected that “it wasn’t easy to say no to marriage with a woman I love.”
“It hurt when she left, and I carried the hurt with me for years,” he added.
Prior to dating Quinlan, Pacino had romances with actresses like Jill Clayburgh, Tuesday Weld and Diane Keaton, his costar in The Godfather movies.
The actor has four kids: Julie, 34, with acting coach Jan Tarrant; 23-year-old twins Anton and Olivia with ex-girlfriend Beverly D’Angelo; and Roman, 16 months, with producer Noor Alfallah.
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Pacino recently told PEOPLE he “just didn’t feel [marriage] ever suited me for some reason.” Plus, a rep for the actor said he and Alfallah “are very good friends, have been for years, and are co-parents” to their son.
“It depends on who you are getting along with,” Pacino said, when asked about his feelings toward marriage now. “If you live together with someone, there’s got to be… You have to have this communion. If you don’t, it’s almost an invasion. So I like to know that if I find a human that I can connect with.”
Sonny Boy is available wherever books are sold.
